Been busy? Here's your weekly round-up of nonsense in one digital lump.
We all lead busy lives. Things to do, people to see. All that. This is the modern age. It's like Fear Factory are prophets or something. We live in a 24-7 world and if you blink, you might just miss something.
This is why we're committed to bringing you a weekly digest of some of the important events of the week. Keep your finger firmly on the pulse with this weekly cheat sheet on all the good stuff you may have missed.
This week brings you hair trickery, burned pizzas, foot surgery. All sorts of shock and intrigue. Scroll down and then you can get on with that ever-growing list of things to do.
So let's do this. No messing about.
COHEED AND CAMBRIA FRONTMAN CLAUDIO SANCHEZ POSTED A PHOTO OF HIS HAIRCUT AND PEOPLE WERE SAD
He didn't, did he? But– what landfill site would accept such an ungodly amount of hair? Crush your curiosity here.
EVER WONDERED WHAT A HEAVY METAL FRONTMAN'S PARTIALLY-AMPTUATED TOE LOOKS LIKE?
Luckily, High On Fire's Matt Pike was only too happy to share this image with the world. Don't make any plans to eat soon.
EVERY TIME I DIE GOT A FREE JAZZ MAKEOVER
A nimble-fingered jazz ensemble gave the Buffalo quintet's heaviest song – that's Underwater Bimbos From Outer Space, before you ask – a challenging reworking. We're into it.
DUTCH PUNKS TUSKY RECREATED METALLICA'S SOME KIND OF MONSTER
The band transformed into Tuskallica for their Goosey Goosey Gander video and absolutely no detail was overlooked. The song's ace, too.
WE VENTURED INTO THE PITS AT DAMNATION FESTIVAL AND RANKED THEM IN ORDER
Our fearless reporter Sam Law got knocked about and shoved around, yet delivered this incisive report from the UK's premier extreme metal festival.
PIZZATRAMP CLEANED OUT THEIR LOCAL SUPERMARKET'S PIZZA FREEZER AND ATE THE LOT IN THE NAME OF PUNK ROCK RESEARCH
The trio steamrollered their way through 10 pizzas of various degrees of tastiness. Apart from bassist Sam, who lives a gluten-free lifestyle. But which member burned their hand in the name of this tasty report? Find out here.
AND FINALLY, CULTURE ABUSE AND 50 FANS PACKED INTO BLONDIES BAR IN LONDON AND HAD A LOVELY TIME
The California quintet laid waste to our favourite dive bar with an arsenal of punk classics. And balloons, too.
Right, that's your lot.
